Someday of my life, I learn to wear a mask so that what's behind it, no one will know. For me taking down the mask was showing your weakness to the others and others will take that chance to take the advantage of you.

For sometimes, I wear the mask even before my best friend, the rules are simple, I wear it so my friends don't get worried. As you know, the mask ain't light at all, its heavy, having it wearing 24 hours a day sure is tiring but exchange for a laughter, why not? That's the thought I thought very long time ago. The only time that I truly take off is when I'm alone in my room at midnight, where as there's no one to talk to you, no one comes to see you and there's peace and quiet.

Times passed, when I once meet a friend, who told me to take that mask off when I'm with true friends, because that's when you can relax and be yourself. He is partially right, as true friends never take the advantage of you and they tried to help you and amazingly the worst part is, "they tried to help you". While showing my true self to another person is like getting my friends all worried about me and tried to help me, but what I need was never the "help". Some just don't understand and thought bad about me and therefore I start to take my mask and start wearing it again.

Being happy on the outside was easy, but who could have seen what's inside of a person? You can say all you want about how much do you know that person but the truth is you know none about him/her. Sometimes the "helping" you all do is not getting any help but instead adding the trouble of that particular person. As for your info, "listening" and "do nothing" is also a kind of help.

I'm tired of this kind of life, who on earth now will understand this feeling of mine~